The swine flu and EngineerBoys bitchy sister

It's been awhile but I have been spending every waking hour with my head in the toilet praying for the ability to throw up. I have spent so much time in the bathroom the tile has an imprint of my butt on it. I saw the doctor and after the exam he told me everything felt and looked great! Yay! No more bed rest! Now it's banishment to the bathroom. I can't wait until my stomach feels better, all I ever want to do it throw up.

The swine flu has attacked! EngineerBoy and I were supposed to go to Mexico for his sisters wedding on Sat (we were to leave this past Tuesday) but of course the swine flu breaks out and me being the anal retentive person I am called my OB and asked what he thought. He told me under no circumstances should I go. Of course this made the sister love me oh so much more. She still isn't happy about the gummy bear and now I say I am not going. You would have thought I told her what a bitch she really is being and that her dress makes her look fat. I told her that I wanted to go (hell I have planning for this trip for 8 months) but the doctor did not want me to take the risk. I am paying this man tons of money to be my doctor and give me the best medical advice possible so of course I am going to listen to him. Plus I have to be careful, I am my mom's only caregiver since my sisters are still at school and I couldn't take the risk of getting it and then bring it back to her, she has a low immune system as it is from the chemo. Just what she needs, to be but in harms way so I can go to the bitches wedding, so sorry I am messing up your life. WonderNurses oncologist even told me it was best for her and ME not to go. There you go, 2 very well respected doctors telling me not to go. Who am I going to listen to, a insurance rep or 2 world renowned doctors? Let me think about that! I never told EngineerBoy not to go, hell I told him from the beginning I wanted him to go. She seems to think though that I threw a fit and made him change his plans. I didn't. I told him to go from Wed (when the rest of the family was going to get there) and stay until Sun but he said no, he didn't want to be away from me that long so he is going from Friday to Sunday. She nor his mom won't talk to me but I don't care. I am the only one that can protect my little gummy bear and she/he is such a miracle that I am going to do everything in my power to protect her/him. I might not be able to protect them from everything but I can do this. Luckily FunJet is being great (probably the first time in the history of travel that the travel industry is actually compassionate) they let us cancel our trip to Mexico and apply the entire amount (they didn't charge any kind of cancellation fees!!!!) to another trip! EngineerBoy and I are going to Jamaica for a week at the end of June to celebrate our anniversary!

I can't wait until the first trimester is over! Not only will the nausea hopefully go away, I will start to show and I will feel more confident that the gummy bear will be OK and I can carry her/him to term. I am still so freaked out that something is going to happen and I will loose the gummy bear! I know bad things can happen at any time but I also know that if I make it to my second trimester I have a better chance of making it to term, I have to hang on to that, thinking about all the bad things that can happen make me want to puke even more!